I’ve always had problems showing affection, all i have inside me is hatred and anger. I’ve suffered from abuse since i was a child, and it have affected me till this day.
I still live with my parents, I’m a great student but i just can’t stand my parents anymore and their behavior. I would rather live alone but i don’t have enough money to be fully independent. I’ve went to therapy and i was diagnosed with anxiety disorder after I’ve noticed that my panic attacks are getting more frequent. I haven’t told my parents and im not planning to do because they will probably think im going crazy. I’ve never been in a relationship and I’m always having problems letting people get close to me because I’m not comfortable enough to trust others anymore. My therapy is helping me control my anxiety but the therapist isn’t giving me any convincing reason to engage and socialize with others. I’m going to admit that I’m a control freak and this is another reason not to allow myself to be in a relationship, because im just scared to be in a relationship were my boyfriend will take the lead over everything and probably my abusive dad is one of the valid reasons of why i can’t trust men anymore, because I’ve always thought that he would be my backbone. Can someone please tell me if they had a similar experience and if they ever over came it? Is it possible to fix myself? How do i get out all the hatred and anger inside me? How do i stop being so distant?
View related questions: live with my parents, money
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