I was engaged to a wonderful guy.He is a virgin and have very high Morales and values.However, i lied to him about my past relationship and virginity.
Engagement called off due to videos and pictures of sexual activity and intimate ones,taken and recorded with my ex boyfriend has been sent to my fiance and his family and my parents and siblings.I am ashamed to look into the eyes of my parents,fiance and in laws.My fiance is heart broken and down and he has blocked me on each and every form of communication.Please advice.Now everyone in my family and fiance family has seen me naked and performing sexual act with my ex boyfriend.What should be done to convince my family and his family?
View related questions: engaged, fiance, my ex
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A female reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (12 October 2018):
You can’t convince them because they SAW the evidence of your lies.YOU made a choice to have sex with your ex, you made the choice to FILM it too.You shouldn’t have lied.I would however, consider suing the pants of your ex for sending these movies to other people – he had no right.
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A male reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (12 October 2018):
“What should be done to convince my family and his family?”I have no good news for you. I have a basic understanding of your culture, and I don’t see a path back here.Ignoring the cultural influence, we find in research that many betrayed partners are more hurt by the deception than by the sex acts. I think this is where your (ex) fiance is right now. He has lost all trust in you because of this Big Lie. Secondly many affair victims say that after finding out that their partner has had sex with another, their mind creates movies of it that play every time intimacy is attempted. Your fiance doesn’t have to guess what you did, he has seen it. Now logically you were not with him at the time of the prior relationship. Whatever you did was two consenting adults not hurting anyone. None of your fiance’s business. Until you lied and proclaimed yourself virinal. Now there is a breach of trust. If you had been so brave before your exposure, there is a chance that something could have been worked out.
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