This question is mainly for men but the ladies can chime in as well.
If you meet a woman for the first time and have only 5 minutes to talk what will you ask or say to her that would leave an impression on her? I am asking this because I go to Speed Dating events where I get only 5 minutes with each woman. I find myself (and others) typically asking the same set of questions like – where are you from? hobbies? what do you do? etc..I want to talk some thing different and stand out from the crowd.
View related questions: speed dating
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A female reader, chigirl + ♥, writes (13 January 2019):
I also have to react to why this is a question for men. Its women you try to impress, not men, right? So a womansanswer should be welcomed. I also agree with the other poster here. Ask about something you actually want to know, and formulate those questions before hand. I would like to be asked: do you like animals/own any pets? Are you religious? Where have you always dreamed of travelling? Such questions can start off a good conversation. Of course after her answer, you must answer your own question too. Make it a dialogue, not an interrogation. And comment on her answers!!
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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (13 January 2019):
Thank you for giving me permission to “chime in”. You see how you got my back up straight away? You didn’t even need 5 minutes! Already I am forming an opinion on why you need advice! I am saying all that tongue in cheek of course, but please take the point on board. It is so easy to make people dismiss you out of hand if they only have minutes to form an opinion about you. If you had come out with something like that on a speed dating “interview” with me, I would have crossed you off my list immediately and dismissed you as arrogant/clueless/thoughtless/an idiot. Scarily, you saw nothing wrong with writing that down so, I assume would have thought nothing wrong about saying it either. As you only have 5 minute, you need to use them wisely. Don’t ask things which are irrelevant or unimportant. Get a feel for what the lady sitting opposite you is like, what makes her tick. Where she’s from, or what she does for a living are largely irrelevant and will have little bearing on a future relationship. You have plenty of time to find out mundane stuff like that IF you get a date.May I suggest a few questions which come to mind which would impress ME if I was on the other side of the table to you (and I AM female so probably have a better general idea of what would impress women than your average guy does – no offence, guys!). “What motivates you to get up on days when you are not working?” “What is your passion?””What sets your heart racing with passion?” “What makes you angry?””What are YOU looking for in a partner?””What would be your ideal first date?”Ask questions which genuinely matter to YOU (not to other guys – you are all different) and LISTEN to the answers. There is little more off-putting than speaking to someone who does not appear to be listening but rather just waiting to jump in with another question. Make eye contact while she is talking, smile, nod in agreement, generally connect with her and make her feel like you are really listening and taking note of what she says. In your shoes I would sit down and think honestly about what YOU are looking for in a partner. What would be a deal breaker for you? What would make YOU want to be in a relationship with someone? Remember, this 5 minute slot you have is not just about impressing the other party but also about YOU deciding if YOU want to get to know this person better. That all said, a cautionary word of warning: given that the two of you only have 5 minutes and don’t know each other beforehand, a lot of the impression you leave will focus on your appearance, shallow as that is, in which case you need to make sure you are well groomed, smartly dressed and smell nice. Good luck.
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