|Question – (18 May 2019)||0 Answers – (Newest, )|
|A female age 22-25, anonymous writes:
I’m wanting some advice about a few issues right now and a bit of perhaps on guidance on what to do next or how to make the next decision on the next chapter.
I’m currently in a small city in the UK and I’ve been struggling with mental health issues for a while now. I used to live in a little village with my boyfriend during uni and he broke up with me after finding out ‘she wasn’t just a friend’ – i was devestated and he made me get out of his house within a few hours, packing everything and that was it. To make it worse, my parents moved far away, my childhood pet died and i was struggling at work. Ever since all that, my mental health has really took a turn for the worst and i have months of being up or down. Anyway, i’m now living with my friends and seeing someone new. However our lease is up very soon and i’m not happy at work. My boss has belittled me in so many ways – saying my accent is a barrier to professionalism, promised payrises with promotion – never happened. Saying i should be careful about writing about the sector i work in (i love having an opinion and it helps me get my head out of work) because it looks like i’m unfaithful to the company? Anyway, so i’m ready to leave. and the jobs for my sector are in the capital and very very scarce here. My bf lease is also ending same time as mine just about and he has previously said he wants to come with me, but now says he’s not sure it can really happen because the chances of us finding a job simultaniously are slim. I’ve let him know that i would be willing to adapt around him – for example staying for a few more months in my job to gain more experience to tie loose ends at his current job (and vise versa)i had a conversation with him last night and he now says he doesn’t know if he see’s a future with me, despite telling me before numerous times he does. I wanted some space after this and he keeps saying he’s sorry and he doesn’t want to throw anything good away. I don’t know what to think. I feel so alone and i’m so scared of being abandoned like before. One other thing we’re stuck on is that i’m not close to my family – my parents are both drug abusers (since i was young) and i don’t really see them much. Perhaps once or twice a year to keep a relationship going best i can. However, my boyfriend also has an unusual family dynamic – his family don’t have any interest in meeting his girlfriends and i don’t think this wil change (long story) Of course, i don’t want to put my issues of not seeing my family on him in any way, but I just feel weird about holidays for exampe- having a partner but not seeing them or being involved in any way. I also am genuinely struggling at this job especially with my boss the way she is, I feel like I shouldn’t speak out anymore or really give my opinion to anything because it isn’t valued. I don’t feel part of the team at all and i don’t know how to make it better for the time i’m still there. Meanwhile, my anxiety and depression i feel is getting heavier and heavier on my down days, and i genuinely just don’t know what my next move is. I really have a lot of doubts about moving to the capital because of very high rent and it will be so difficult to save for a house – but the options anywhere else is so limited. The only other option i would consider due to not being close to my family is moving abroad. Eqaully, should I cut off ties with my current boyfriend who sounds like he just doesn’t know what he wants?
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