I met an amazing woman the other day. I’ve already gone out with her a couple of times and we’ve even had sex. The only thing is that she’s 35 and I’m 22. She also has a 10 year old boy. I’ve tried to talk myself out of this a million times, but that fact is, I’m attracted to her. I guess I prefer mature woman over others. I mean, our conversations are fun and exciting and have lasted for hours on end. Weird, I know….but, I like her.
I guess I’m just curious to know what others think about my situation. Is this even worth continuing?
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A male reader, WiseOwlE + ♥, writes (15 November 2018):
You also need a man’s point of view on this matter; and I hope other uncles will respond to your post. You’ve already had sex; and evidently that occurred very shortly after a couple of dates. There is always a fascination and excitement about a new experience; and exploring unknown territory. You’re appreciating the novelty of the fact she’s an older-woman; so now you guess you “prefer” mature-women over others. The important thing is that you’re wise beyond your years; and mature enough yourself to deal with what you “prefer!”It’s very common, almost cliche, that very inexperienced young people consider having great conversation and chatting a lot; as some sort of viable connection. That’s yet to be determined. You haven’t known her long enough to know if you really like her; or just having sex with her, and talking.Sex after two dates is a great incentive for someone your age; and easy-access and availability of it is like being a kid in a candy shop. Sex is often used as bait. You could easily get played; because you can just as easily be considered a boy-toy scratching an itch. Your youthful sexual-stamina is also a novelty to her, to some degree.Make sure you’re both on the same page about where this is going; because you may serve a purpose, but not necessarily have a lasting or meaningful place in her life.You’ve known her a couple of weeks; and you really need to get to know her besides the fun and lengthy conversation.You can talk a blue-streak and have a great conversation; and the novelty might wear-off by the next date. You hardly know what you have in-common; or what her personality is really like.Get to know her, let her get to know you; and try not to let sex cloud your judgement. Use discernment, and try to see women aside from how they fit into a type, or a sexual-fantasy. The MILF-fantasy or Mrs. Robinson might be exciting; but most women don’t like being a passing-curiosity, fetish, or novelty. She might be a little awkward in your social-circle. She has a kid, and you can’t just pop in and out of her life at your convenience. Fast-sex is great, but interest usually fizzles-out almost just as fast; and feelings get hurt in the process.
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A male reader, kenny + ♥, writes (15 November 2018):
At the end of the day age is only a number, provided of course it all falls in the legal age of censent bracket. People have made relationships work with age gaps far greater than 13 years. I think if you both get along and a romantic connection is felt by both parties then i don’t see a problem with it. Give it a go, see what happens and let the chips fall where they may. You might find in a few months this is not for you. Alternatively you might find she is the one for you. But you won’t find that out until you try.Good luck
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A female reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (15 November 2018):
What do you have in common?Is what you have (besides sex and fun conversations) something you can build on?While I think relationships where there is a BIG age gap often become uneven and the two people in this relationship are at two different stages in life. See, she has already gone through most of what you are ABOUT to do in life.If she decided that maybe having a second child was something she wanted she pretty much had to do in “now” as 35 is getting up there when it comes to fertility and hopes for a healthy child.You on the other hand, are 22… barely left your teenage years behind so becoming a father might not be something you would want.Then you have her with a 10 year old child. Who ( I presume) is her main priority in life. Which mean you might be a lot lower in the “priority totem pole”.And let’s not forget, YOU JUST met!Of course things are fun and exciting! You can see where this leads you. You might discover that you have more in common than you thought. And you might find that you don’t.
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