I recently transferred into a different team at work and started working very closely with the guy who recommended me for the role.
I REALLY like him as as a person and we get along great. Sometimes have suspicion that he ‘likes’ me, but then I think its impossible because I’m not in his league physically. (I look like Shannon Purser, he looks like Ryan Gosling with glasses).The last time I fell for a guy at work it did not end well, so I’ve sworn off dating for a while. The truth is I don’t know what I want, but it would help to know what HE wants.He is very complimentary to me and my work, nothing like his other female colleagues who he usually just teases and heckles. When we get going on a topic together people give us weird looks because we’re so passionate about technical stuff which they perceive as nonsense.He lives with a two very glamorous and attractive women (who are in relationships with other guys). Outside and inside work he is surrounded by models and other gorgeous women; but he’s been single for a long time. When I suggest any of them come to our meetings he kindly implies that it will go over their head.We dress pretty casual at the office and he spends half the time with his shirt untucked. The other day we were in a meeting (alone) and he yanked his shirt out of his belt to use it to clean his glasses. Way higher that he needed to to achieve his goal. (He flashed me his midriff almost to his pecs.)Today someone made a joke that he and I should get together to take advantage of an office policy around Christmas gifts for partners.I’m trying not to read into things, but when we brainstorm at the same computer he usually manages to touch my hand accidentally.I guess I know the answer, sit back and wait. See what happens. Tread cautiously…. but I’m equally worried about accidentally putting him off as I am about letting him get too close.I carried a torch for the last guy for WAY too long. I’m afraid to open my heart again.
View related questions: at work, christmas, flirt
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A female reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (11 October 2018):
I think he IS flirty but I think you need to use that big brain of yours and realize that romance in the work place isn’t a smart move. What happened last time you mixed work and romance? hmm?To quote you:” The last time I fell for a guy at work it did not end well”. So why on Earth would you try that again?!YOU just transferred in. You have a team-mate whom you get along well with and work well with… HOW do think thing would go if the romance didn’t pan out? Could you still work with him?And you have no idea of how many women he goes through.He knows he is attractive, he likes the tease, and he likes to make you think you are smarter than all the other women there….I’d be very vary here. JUST stick to being professional.You go to work, to work. NOT to look for your next romantic conquest.Your work place is NOT a dating place. You aren’t there to scoop up potential bed-mates or partners or … crushes.If you are ready to date after LAST fiasco… Then look OUTSIDE your job for a potential BF.You are old enough to know better.
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