A female Health And Fitness my-boyfriend-got-a-cake-and-presents-and-its-not-his-birthday My boyfriend got a cake and presents and its not his birthday Relationship & Sex    age 36-40, anonymous writes:

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Dear All,

Today my boyfriend of 3.5 years received an anonymous gift, cake and a red rose. It mentioned his petname and said “your smile is everything to me.”The cover of the cake mentioned ” happy birthday”. It is not his birthday.My boyfriend is a bit of a flirt and is 8 years younger than me. We have had somand downs.I am confused. i don’t know how to react.e

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A male reader, WiseOwlE Health And Fitness my-boyfriend-got-a-cake-and-presents-and-its-not-his-birthday-1 My boyfriend got a cake and presents and its not his birthday Relationship & Sex     + , writes (17 March 2019):

Are you sure he’s not pulling your chain? Isn’t it odd that he lets you see the cake? He’s either innocent, or testing you.If you’ve had a recent argument, or you’ve been difficult to get along with lately; maybe he concocted some little scheme to get you jealous. It just doesn’t make sense he’d bring it home. He knew you’d react just the way you’re behaving about it. You’re not confused. You’re upset, jealous, and suspicious.Why did you mention his age? Are you insecure about the fact he is 8 years younger? If you know he’s a flirt, how has your relationship lasted 3.5 years?If it’s anonymous, and not a scheme to get you going; maybe he really doesn’t know who it’s from. It didn’t say “Happy Birthday;” so it’s just a cake. It’s possible whoever sent it doesn’t know he has a girlfriend. Well, what was he supposed to do with the gift, cake, and rose from an “anonymous” giver?Personally, I don’t consume food items when I don’t know whom or where it came from. You can’t refuse a gift; if you don’t know who the giver is. No more than you can control an anonymous crush, when you don’t know who the person is.It’s creepy, but don’t get too upset; when neither of you know who gave him the rose, cake, or gift. I guess you can only wonder, but getting upset about it will probably please the anonymous-giver to know he (yes he) or she may have caused a rift in your relationship. Unless you have some facts to justify being upset, let it go. If you’re always on edge or insecure, because of the age-difference; your ups and downs may be approaching the end of the relationship. No relationship can withstand or survive jealousy, flirting, or insecurity. Those traits are toxic.

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