A female Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    age 36-40, anonymous writes:

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I’m worried about a guy friend as he’s got himself involved with a girl who is bad news.

Hes started distancing himself from everyone who’s warning him and is distancing himself from close friends She’s a complete bitch sorry to say – take a money from him, insults him. They have split 3 times but she’s reunited with him conveniently for christmas I know people will say he’s a grown man etc but me and my friends know he’s has self esteem issues and this madam is taking advantage He won’t listen to anyone so not sure what to do />Any advice?

View related questions: christmas, money, self esteem

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-1 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     + , writes (24 December 2018):

Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    In my culture there’s a saying that goes, you can wake someone who’s sleeping but you can’t ever awaken someone who’s pretending to sleep. Your friend knows exactly what is happening and chooses to go along with it. It’s his choice. Why are you feeling bad for him? He’s happy with the way things are or he would have ended it himself!

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A female reader, mystiquek Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     + , writes (24 December 2018):

Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-1 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    This is one of the those times where all you can do is be there if things fall apart and he needs a friend. You can try all you want to talk to him but he apparently is in love. Love blinds you and he is seeing what he wants to see. Hopefully he will take off the rose colored glasses and see the woman for who she really is but until then, just let him know that you are there if he needs you.

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A female reader, Honeypie Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     + , writes (24 December 2018):

Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-2 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    What exactly do you think we (total Internet strangers) can do that YOU can’t?He is a grown MAN, he is RESPONSIBLE for HIS actions and choices. And he has CHOSEN to date this woman and take her back after the various break ups.If you have told him you feel he is making a bad choice and explained why, then there really ISN’T much else you can do.HE has to realize this on his own and take the action to end it ON HIS OWN.He might know she is bad news, but if he is sticking it out with her, HE is getting something out of it. Or he thinks she will “change”, or that things will get better.I know it sucks to watch a friend do stupid stuff and get hurt, but this is HIS mistake to make.

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-2 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     + , writes (24 December 2018):

Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-3 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    You cant help him, he has to want to get out of it himself. If you feel so inclined be there to pick up the pieces if / when it all coms crumbling down but there is nothing you can do except get on with living your own life.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious Health And Fitness my-friend-has-gotten-himself-involved-with-a-bad-girl-and-i-want-to-help-him-but-unsure-what-to-do-3 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     + , writes (24 December 2018):

Health And Fitness cb00d1ef-0a14-495d-ae29-55bd6b6b2f04 My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex    The more you try to distance your friend from this woman, the more he will dig his heels in and distance himself from YOU. While I can understand your approach, it is counterproductive – as you have already learned. I think the best thing you can do in this situation is try not to comment on her at all but make sure your friend knows he can talk to you IF he wants/needs to. When he does talk to you, try to remain neutral. Don’t criticize the woman as that will only put your friend’s back up. HE is allowed to moan about her but YOU are not allowed to say anything bad about her. Instead try saying things like “And how does that make you feel when she does/says that?” Let him talk. Let him know you are there for him. Apart from that, let him make his own decisions. If he knows you are there for him when needed, without being judgmental of his life choices, he is far more likely to stay in contact, keep communications ongoing with you and far more likely to eventually realize that he is worth better than this woman. He has to make that decision for himself though. You cannot control him, painful as it is to watch him going through this. You are obviously good friends. He is lucky to have you. Try to cut him a bit of slack so that he can rely on you to be there for him without trying to make his decisions for him. Hopefully, with our support, he will eventually realize this woman is not good for him .

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A female reader, NORA B Health And Fitness ie My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do Relationship & Sex     +, writes (24 December 2018):

I understand your worry about your friend and it is difficult to stand by and do nothing.But no man will accept advise..on a woman they find attractive or are in-love with.So in this case….Sometimes in doing Nothing…..you are doing something.By that i mean be in the wings for your friend…when he needs you be there for him.Give this situation…TIME….because it will take time for him to see this woman as she is….as unkind and a user.But there is Only so much a man will take….and he will decide to walk away .He is very lucky to have friends that care for him.Best regards..NORA B.

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